Advice for Small Businesses

The Art of Networking

Tom Ossa, Rockland Web Design

A Commentary by Tom Ossa, Rockland Web Design

I recently read an excellent article about the Top Ten Myths of Networking, by Liz Ryan. I agree with many of her points, and would like to expand on her insight within each of her items in the top ten list. You'll notice that I use the word "human" a lot. The reason why is that if we really think about it, networking is really just about being human:

Myth: Networking means meeting lots of people.
Truth: Good networking involves developing quality relationships with people whom you can help, and they can help you. It does not mean walking around acting lilke Austin Powers and acting all glitzy. It means being yourself and accepting that you can't know everyone and vice-versa. But you can be fortunate to meet someone that you connect with, both on a friendly and professional level.

Myth: Networking means telling people about your business whenever you get a chance.
Truth: Actually that turns people off...a lot. It sends the message that the individual is only concerned about his or her interests, and not anyone else. While we all are looking out for our personal objectives, it's always good to get to know someone on a human level first.

Myth: Networking is hard work.
Truth: For some, it is. But my guess is that those people are feeling a little weird, shy or awkward when talking to new people, perhaps because they are only thinking of their business objectives. Take it from a guy that has Networked for over 10 years...networking is not only fun, it can be a healthy release of tension when getting to know more and more people in relaxed environments. If you do it the right way, not only will you laugh more, talk more and hear more interesting stories, you will also gain a considerable amount of business.

Myth: Networking should start when you're job-hunting.
Truth: Networking probably ends when you're job hunting, because you didn't network the right way. Just kidding. Actually networking should start when you're about Pre-School age, and learning to socialize with other human beings. However if you are like me and didn't even go to kindergarten (wasn't mandatory back then), there's still hope for you. My suggestion is to go to a few networking meetings, and get this...don't talk business. Tell people the name of your company and THAT'S IT. Then start asking this question: "What do you do?" Look for opportunities to switch topics away from the cold-hearted business world and get to know your fellow homo-sapiens.

Myth: Networking is for schmoozers.
Truth: Yes and no. The term "schmooze" is of Yiddish origin, and its formal definition is "to chat in a friendly and persuasive manner especially so as to gain favor, business, or connections". At the very least you must be willing to do the following...

1. Show up
2. Walk up to people that are talking with each other
3. Listen in on the conversation
4. When people start looking at you, say "hi"
5. Expect that you might need to open your mouth and say something else that contributes to the conversation at some point

If you can do that, you're on your way to being a Yiddish Schmoozer.

Myth: Networking is only for entrepreneurs.
Truth: There are lots of entrepreneurs in the room, yes. But let me share a quick story with you. A while back, I was let go from a web design company; I poured my very soul into that job. One of my roles was to go to the ProMetroNet Core Group each week. I'll never forget the day I showed up after leaving the job, and telling the Core Group about my misfortune. They were so encouraging - as a matter of fact each and every one of them gave me valuable business advice that I use to this day in my work as a Web Design Company owner. They also made a very cool symbolic gesture - they each took one of my employee business cards, and tore it up, and told me that the best days are ahead of me, not behind.

My point is that whether you are an employee, an entrepreneur, a business owner, manager or a freelancer, if you get into a good networking group there is more than just doing business. Much more.

Myth: Networking is a waste of time.
Truth: There are a lot of things that seem to be wastes of time. Spending time with family, exercise, education, investing, etc. But the long term results speak for themsleves. Networking returns business, strategic alliances, and most importantly, new friends.

Myth: Networking is expensive.
Truth: Like advertising, Networking is a business expense. So you can deduct these items from your taxes. But beyond that, understand that there are different types of Networking groups, some which offer free or trial memberships, or pay-as-you-go plans. ProMetroNet offers a yearly membership that is half the price of BNI, LeTip or other for-profit groups, and also offers bi-monthly events that cost a fraction the price of membership with no long term commitments.

Myth: Networking is phony.
Truth: I could write a quick joke or analogy to simply dismiss this notion, but let me be more objective.

We've already defined the term "schmoozing", which is "to chat in a friendly and persuasive manner especially so as to gain favor, business, or connections". Further, Webster's defines "networking" as "the cultivation of productive relationships for employment or business".

If we are going to networking meetings simply to gain favor, or otherwise cultivate a "productive relationship", wouldn't that be boring as all hell?

Let me make a suggestion - and it's going to be a controversial one. Before you walk up to someone in a Networking event, have a beer. You'll loosen up, and feel a little easier about going to talk with someone you have never met before. I'm not saying get drunk...far from it. I'm saying don't think of your existence in a room full of people as simply the conduit for cultivating a "productive relationship". If you do, you might as well walk up to everyone with a pre-nuptual agreement in hand.

Myth: Networking is a thing of the past.
Truth: Apparently I didn't get the memo 10 years ago when I was a budding 22 years old. Now at the age of 32, I can truly say that Netowkring is very alive and well. But like all other aspects of work and life, it involves making the effort to extend one's hand and meet new people...whether or not they are your next multi-million dollar deal.

I leave you with something to ponder. The handshake has evolved from its original use that was created by cavepersons - to let others know that they weren't hiding any weaponry. My question to you is this: when you happen to be at a party, a gathering, a coffee shop or a networking event, and you meet someone new...what does your handshake mean?